Where did 2008 go? It went by so fast, I don't even know where to begin. Let's see......I am living in a 1BR and once had 2 cars. I sold one and kept the other because it was really crazy to keep both. I got promoted! I am grateful that my prayers have been answered.

Sadly, I started going back to my old habit of focusing on my career, and only my career. My Doctor friend decided that she had enough, and moved on. She was tried of waiting.......waiting for me to turn the corner. I really have this tendency of focusing on the future, and not living in the present. That is why I have gained a lot professionally, but my personal life has suffered.

I go home everyday, and enjoy the material wealth that Uncle Sam has given me. I have a 50 inch flat in my living room with matching surround sound, and a 32 flat in my bedroom to compliment my platform bed. I am slowly realizing that my apartment is full of nice things, but still somewhat empty. It's all superficial. I look at my siblings, and they are really happy........not because of their material wealth, but because they have their families.....it's real!

I taught myself how to drink. I got so waisted during my birthday. I just woke up on my couch not knowing how I got home. I was lucky enough that someone brought me home. According to my friends, she really took care of me. If you see her, she is tall, smart, and very pretty, but I will just stop there......because I have no idea where this thing is going....might be another topic all together.

That's the gist......will update soon.

Turning the Corner....

In a job interview almost always will you hear the question: "How do you see yourself 5 years from now?"......I always would think of the answer.....5....10 years??.....What?.....Where?....etc. Honestly, you will never know.............

One thing I realized....when you have Faith, you will be fine. I look at life differently now. I am aware that things always change.....like the weather.....i guess......so I always keep in mind that the sun will shine after every downpour....... "Everything is gonna be alright."......................It's true! ;-)

WOW!.....time really flies. Thanks for all the comments, prayers, and general help (from family and friends).

I really started to doubt where this adventure will take me. I questioned my abilities, my confidence, and my faith many times through the years, but not as many as the past 5. I really wanted to give up already.........I just could not accept that after all my sacrifices/losses, I will walk away a failure.....hindi dapat!

It's been 5 years since I left Manila.........and who knew that all these things happened to me within those years. I got a Master's Degree, a divorce, lost my savings, lost my home, lived with my cousins and also my brother, got a job, got promoted, driving 2 cars (one is actually parked in my cousin's driveway), dating a doctor, and now about to buy my own place!...................ohhhh, and physically moved 7 times from place to place! WOW!!!.......all in 5 years!

I always thought of stability, but I guess it's not reality on my end. I was offered a job in Geneva, but I was not ready to jump again. My old boss offered me a position, and it was really tempting, but it was just too soon. I was just recovering.

I am now in between places. All my things are in storage, and I am now staying with friends in Gotham. I have mastered the art of commuting. I can give anyone a tour of the city........what version do you want??............."You've got Mail, Serendipity, Sex in the City (too many sites though)"...........etc. It's just a subway ride away. Do you like to shop?...what's your budget? ....the best places are still the outlets in NJ.......not unless you just want to experience 5th Ave or SoHo.


"Life is really like a Box of Chocolates!"............I never would have guessed that I would end up this way. I feel better though!.........all water under the bridge. I still feel empty at times, but who doesn't? I guess my journey is back on the right track. I work my normal hours (50+ a week), and I am rewarded for my efforts. I have a nice view of the Hudson, Ellis Island, and Lady Liberty..........it seems unreal at times......but hey!..................... It's good!!!

I also want to tell everyone that I will be going home Sept.20 to Oct.8...............this time with the proper state of mind! See everyone soon!

My Life 3.........Life in Gotham

A famous singer once said NYC is the modern day ROME!......that's before he got shot outside his building.

People mutate here. We go to work with no emotion..... go straight to work and not notice things around us. We dart from train to train....walk as fast as we can, and give the occational finger when someone bumps you for no apparent reason. Everything is in fast forward mode!

People think Gotham is a wonderful place.......I say it depends. If you're weak, it will eat and spit you out the Hudson River. The people that make it, become a different breed. They bow down to a piece of paper with Washington's face on it.... so that they can buy stuff with funny brand one-namers.

"When in Rome, do what the Romans do". I am guilty of mutating......I am slowly understanding how my ex-wife has changed as well. I really can not pin-point a reason for the mutation, but it's true! I guess I also understand why people who live in Gotham want to get out of the city every weekend.......to be human again.........no wonder I would always go to see my family. I guess there's hope!

My Life 2

I really thought that things were getting better. There were the occational spats, but nothing serious. I would study during the night and everything seemed good......And so I thought.

I didn't know that she was starting to feel really bad because I was no longer the same person from "Glory Years" back home. She would tell me every so often that something was bothering her, but she could not pin point what it was.

Sadly, divorce is so easy to do here in America. I remember my father saying in a jokingly way: "Since a marriage involves a contract, it should be renewable every 5 years." In America, this might hold true! Just file it, and if there's no problem......You get it in 3-6 months. Throw away the Covenant you made in front of the Altar of the Lord, and throw away the Sacraments.....That's a modern society for you!

It was hard to accept. Believe me, I almost gave up. I went home to talk to a Priest. I asked for forgiveness every time. I was scared of God because I allowed it to happen. I went to confession 4 times for the same reason.......My divorce.

As the months passed, I started picking up the pieces of my tattered life. My family and friends were great! They were there for me. I woke up one morning to the show Good Morning America, and there was this person talking and she shared a quote and it goes something like; "A brave person will not live long, but a conservative one will always have a lingering question....has he ever lived at all?" AND something just clicked!

I now work for a very big firm. I like it a lot. I am back focused once again.......trying to be the best in the field. This is what I am good at, and I am happy doing it......... to be continued

I struggled as a kid to get attention. My parents seperated when I was 10. My Mom went straight to NYC and would come home every other year. I remember her being very strict.....her standards were very high, and I remember getting slapped so many times. I was really a good kid then. I would try my best ti make everyone happy. However, one day I woke up, and she was gone!

My Dad was my idol growing up. He never got mad. He was always away though. He would go to his farm and stay there for days. He also had this "Peter Pan Syndrome"........never wanting to get old. He would always tell people that he stopped counting in his 30s.

I have an older sister and brother. I guess you can say that I grew up with them as my pseudo parents. I know for a fact that till this day, I would listen more when my sister speaks than my Mom.

Growing up as the youngest boy in a big family (cousins included) really was hard. I would always get bullied by the other boys (my bother included). I remember that I had to pay off some of my cousins with my lunch money just for them to stop!........That sets the stage heading in to my teen-age years.

I started getting mad.......always! I would take it out on my classmates in school. I would do worse things to them, and when I get really angry, I would look for fights with boys from other schools. I have fought so many times.....I can't count them anymore. I almost got killed once, I was beaten up by a politician's son, together with his bodyguards. I was lucky I was able to get out of that incident in one piece. Everything was really a blur during those years. I'm just grateful to my family and friends for being there......if not, who knows where I would be.

I started working right after college. I actually was better at work than I was in school. I was always focused. I had my disappointments as well, but they were just tools for me to jump back in. I would work harder....to the point that my world became just my work. I was determined to succeed, and climb the corporate ladder as fast as I can..... I did, and was given the GM position at the age of 30

I got married pretty young. I was 25, and wanted to settle down. I was sick of the dating scene. I married a very nice and sweet young lady. She comes from a conservative family, and I thought she would always be there for me. I remember one of my closest friends telling me that I am lucky because I will grow old gracefully with her.......and I believed it!

Coming from a broken home, really gave me a scare on having children. I was scared that if I was not emotionally and finacially solid....my family will suffer. As the years went by, my wife started getting affected by the notion of not having children.

My father in law, a self-made man, has always told me that if I want to further succeed in life, America is the place to be. He would share his stories, and I would listen.......I admired him for what he accomplished, and I guess the idea always lingered in my mind. The situation in the country I was living in was not getting any better. In fact, it was really getting worse.

One day I just got fed up! I asked my wife if she wanted to try it out, and she said YES! I resigned from my GM position, and Regional management couldn't understand why......I just told them because of personal reasons......I had to go. It was a crazy move, but life is all about decisions and risks..........If we were to do it.....it should be immediate because we were not getting any younger.

We sold everything and left for the U.S. Reality quickly set in, and it came hard! I had to wait for a year to get my documents, and my wife, who was an american, was working. She started out in a retail outlet, and slowly moved up. I started feeling useless, and just didn't know what to do. The thought of leaving the life I had, was haunting me daily.

I decided to go to Grad. School. I was able to get financial aid from the government, was accepted in a very good school. I would go to school and spend a lot of time in the library. I wanted to focus my energy in learning, and re-gain my confidence.

My wife has successfully landed a job in a global company. She was on her way to a successful career. We bought a 2 bedroom condo in a nice area on NJ. We took a risk because if we don't buy, we would be priced out of the area we wanted to live in.

to be continued.....